Okay, here it is: the last vestiges of 2011. I hope you’ve enjoyed our run down of the year Spin Magazine called the Great Big No. Here’s to a better 2012!

Top Five Honolulu Shows I Attended

5. Ramblin’ for Raegan: This show was amazing. While we didn’t cover it here at HEP, L did at her own blog. The event was for the charity of Raegan, a five year old girl who tragically lost her father a month prior. Narwhal rocked the house and it was the first time we saw Discord & Rye doing their sexy thing. Ong King is a great space for a show and the art that was up was an excellent time filler between bands.

4. At Sea Returns: At Sea, a post-rock band that had been on hiatus for four years, returned in a big way in July. Supported by the equally awesome “space rock” band Clones of the Queen, they packed thirtyninehotel fuller than any show I’d seen before or have seen since. This was certainly a special performance that I’d have been loathe to miss.

3. Young Fangs Anna’s Show: This show was actually a surprise. We hadn’t seen Narwhal for almost a month and went to hit up their first show back. That show happened to also be the final one in a mini-tour for the Alaskan Indie band Young Fangs. Add Siblings and campfire to the bill and you have yourself an excellent evening.

2. Black Square CD Release Party: If you’ve been keeping up with these lists, then you’d know that I listed Black Square as the fourth best band I heard this year. This show was where that all began. The epic four hour show included sets by Upstanding Youth, Raised By Wolves, Narwhal, and, of course, the China Town powerhouses. It had everything you want in a release party: crazy performances, merch of every variety, dancing, and alcohol. Much alcohol. I think my body was running on beer alone since I sweated all the water out in the mosh pit that opened up.

1. Halloween Party at White Tiger Lounge/Orphanage/Dollhouse: Before October 30, 2011, I thought I knew what a house show was. On that night, however, everything I had ever attended before began to look like Uncle Fred with a guitar at the family reunion. Siblings and Narwhal turned a quaint living room into a battleground full of screaming, jumping, moshing characters in various stages of costume. The brightest moment for me was actually captured on tape by Travis. “Tell Me” is, bar none, my favorite song to hear live. We did it harder and crazier than we ever will again. Having this much fun should be illegal.

Well, that’s it folks. Thank you for a wonderful 2011. Let’s all hope the world doesn’t end before we can do more of these lists next year!

UNTIL NOW. Year End List! Part 4 is much more positive than yesterday’s. Savor it, as there is only one more to go.

Top Five Best Music Videos

5. “Blow” by Ke$ha: Ke$ha may represent all that’s terrible with pop music, but this video is pure gold. James Van Der Beek gets dissed, a laser fight breaks out of nowhere, and unicorns bleed rainbows. Let me say that last part again: unicorns bleed rainbows. Let’s forget how terribly creepy they are and all have a good laugh over their deaths.

4.  ”Short Lived” by Siblings: Travis D Wiggins is a Renaissance Man. He DJs, is one half of Coral Stabz (as well as other projects), and makes lovely music videos. This gem is by far the scene’s best video of the year, featuring everyone’s favorite lovable punk band, Siblings, in hand drawn stop motion animation. That Short Lived is also one of my favorite punk tracks of the year doesn’t hurt, either. Check out some of Travis’ other work on YouTube.

3. “The Creep” by The Lonely Island: SNL offspring The Lonely Island were one of the biggest success stories of 2010 after reminding the world that comedy music can also be great listening. Continuing this on their second album, Turtleneck & Chain, the trio gave us songs about sex (especially involving mothers), Jack Sparrow, and the Golden Rule. The Creep stands out, however, for giving us possibly the greatest dance move ever. Bonus points for getting Nicki Minaj to go for first base with a corpse.

2. “Party Rock Anthem“/”Sexy and I Know It” by LMFAO: Although they also made our more dubious list, LMFAO still blew away 2011. “Party Rock Anthem” came out of nowhere in March and took over clubs and pop radio stations. Party songs are great, but only one is so great that it turns otherwise normal hipsters into shufflin’ zombies. “Sexy and I Know It” successfully built upon the catchy-dance-beat-plus-cool-dance-circles and upped the ante with speedos. Lady Gaga may have been Born This Way, but I submit that dancing around in a banana hammock next to “The Hedgehog” was the real show of positive body image.

1. “Simple Math” by Manchester Orchestra: I only very recently came in contact with this absolutely fantastic music video. I am a real sucker for good cinematography (which most music videos lack) and “Simple Math” has some of the best I’ve seen. To be able to tell the story of a whole life of heartache and pain in five minutes is seriously impressive, especially with the use of Inception-style memories-in-memories, all tied together by a terrible accident and wonderfully powerful song.

Hope everyone’s fully recovered from their hangovers because it’s time for list number three!:

Top Five Most Annoying Songs

5. “Red Solo Cup” by Toby Keith: I love parties and, by extension, songs about parties. Andrew W. K. would approve, I’m sure. But, even that love cannot save this terrible song that is, literally, about a plastic cup, albeit a lovably crimson one. And it’s sung by Toby Keith, the Michele Bachmann of country.

4. “Champagne Showers” by LMFAO: The geniuses behind the smash hit that made shufflin’ more popular than any zombie move ever could quickly followed up with this more sanguine video. The song is boring and obnoxious, with the only saving grace being fifteen seconds of bubbly carnage. While not the worst song in it’s own right, “Champagne Showers” should have been so much better. The let down was palpable.

3. Anything dubstep ever: Dubstep (especially of the “Brostep” variety) was everywhere this year. It seems every pop artist sold their soul to the wobble gods and there wasn’t a club or ‘party’ radio station that didn’t blast this stuff. I’ll admit that I’ve enjoyed some dubstep this year, but, like “The Middle” or Angry Birds, the oversaturation of the genre has ruined any more enjoyment I could have had. Cyanide and Happiness said it right.

2. “Hold it Against Me” by Britney Spears: Yes, I understand this is somewhat redundant with number 3, but this song was so bad that it deserved special recognition. I’ll start off by saying that, despite my general disdain for pop music, I am glad that Britney Spears is back with the (mostly) sane world and not off shaving her head. That said, “Hold it Against Me” is, chiefly, a song entirely about the worst pickup line known to man (scientific fact) and most of the lyrics are comprised of slightly-better-but-still-terrible lines. The club douchebags don’t need any help, Brit. And don’t even get me started on the music video with it’s rampant product placement, Lady Gaga wannabe fashion, and digitally enhanced boobage. Even the bosom isn’t safe from this monstrosity.

1. “Friday” by Rebecca Black: This one is a no brainer. This song of epic lyrics about eating cereal and choosing a seat in a car driven by a middle schooler was also the number one viewed video on YouTube. First week sales of the song topped 40,000 and it received extensive air time. Rebecca Black has become a celebrity, gone on tours, started a record label, and starred in a Katy Perry video. That the worst, most annoying song of the year is also one of the most successful exemplifies all that is wrong with pop culture. And, yes, I did catch myself singing that damn song in the shower.

Top Five Bands Kendle Listened to For the First Time

5. Black Lips: I first heard this Atlanta, GA based garage rock band on the Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World soundtrack. Little did I know that “O Katrina!“, despite it’s snappy buzz, was fairly tame as compared to the drug-fueled decadence that was the rest of 500 Million Thousand. And I loved every minute of it. Good, Bad, Not Evil, their previous, more critically acclaimed album, was fueled by more of surf rock sound, though still tinged with the dirty, DIY, sound that made them authorities on the garage rock scene in “New Garage Explosion!“.

4. Black Square: Josh86 is a pillar in Chi-To culture, and his band Black Square is one of the scene’s best bands. Their solid ska-punk sound is always exciting and their wonderful stage presence makes sitting on the sidelines near impossible. Every show, they rock out like they’re playing their biggest, whether to ten people or a hundred, and that energy is damned infectious. We’ve blogged about Black Square on a few occasions, but no amount of praise can overstate their quality as musicians and performers. And, after ten mainland tours, two compilations, and four albums, that quality can only continue to bring them more well-deserved success.

3. The Black Keys: Even before their 2010 release of  Brothers, this Akron, OH band was everywhere. Movies, commercials, and radio stations of every stripe have all bought into the blues rock duo. Normally, the hipster in me would want to eschew them for this rampant commercialization but, honestly, their music is just too f’in good. I picked up the aforementioned Brothers a few months ago and am constantly impressed by how pop-catchy they can make songs that are best suited for a dingy, smoke-filled bar where real men shoot whiskey and the mob has a stake. To get a taste, check out “Tighten Up“ and “Next Girl“.

2. Mumford & Sons: The first band on this list not of a ‘black’ variety is also the best Americana band that isn’t American. Following their 2010 success of Sigh No More, this four person British group led by the titular Marcus Mumford were 2011′s counterpoint to the electronic domination of dubstep, making sometimes rambunctious, and always lovely, music involving accordions, mandolins, and dobros. Their songs are deep, meaningful, and, really, honest, capturing the everyman’s sense of love and pain. My personal favorite is certainly “Winter Winds“

1. (G)NARWHAL: 2011, above all else, was the year I went from a hapless young soldier wandering around Waikiki to blogging about Honolulu happenings. The catalyst? A band named Narwhal. The three-piece’s crazy shows put me on a scavenger hunt around China Town and the greater Honolulu area, introduced me to many wonderful people I now count as friends, and, most obviously, gave me something to do on almost every night of the week (Sunday’s a total wash, though).

With an original sound that has elements of surf, punk, and old school rock and roll, (G)Narwhal (I think they’re in the process of picking up the ‘G’) has had great year. They celebrated their banniversary in May, recorded and released their second EP, Phases, in November, and had a successful mini-tour in San Francisco that same month. Their performances have consistently one-upped themselves, from the original “Lies” to “Tell Me” list with a handful of us bobbing in the front to the raging moshes that now erupt on the first song of their sets. Erica has improved as a vocalist, now utilizing much more of her range, as well as her stage presence. Nick has refined his guitar work into the now recognizable ‘Nick Ayakawa‘ style, proving that he is one of the scene’s best guitarists. And Adam, a drummer who’s speed and endurance were already a thing to admire, has provided a vivid backdrop in all of their new songs for his comrades to enliven with melody.

Besides their improvements as individuals, (G)Narwhal has really come together as a band. Instead of sitting on their hands and being content to play the same Cow Belly songs every other week or so, they spent much of 2011 writing new material, practicing, and playing shows often. Their chemistry has never been better and they are truly on the up.

So, here’s to you, (G)Narwhal. You were my favorite new band of the year 2011. Let’s all hope that 2012 can see you continue your rise to the top.

Here’s how this is going to work: We’re going to do five ‘Top Five’ lists spaced out over five days; one today, one tomorrow, and so on. These lists  have all been painstakingly compiled by Kendle with L in an advisory/veto role. So, without further ado:

Top Five Biggest Music News Stories

5. White Stripes Abruptly Break Up: Despite Jack White’s heavy commitment to  the Raconteurs and Dead Weather, news of the White Stripes’ sudden breakup seemly came out of nowhere and was a terrible birthday present for Kendle. Lucky for us fans, they are going to continue releasing vault songs for years to come. And, unlike Tupac, it won’t be all creepy and beyond the grave.

4. LCD Soundsystem Finish Their Run: In an epic, once-in-a-lifetime concert, LCD Soundsystem completed their promised time as a band, ending a ten year career that saw James Murphy, a 41 year old producer and co-founder of DFA Records, become a beacon of cool. There has never been a show Kendle wanted to attend more. Check out some of the videos on Youtube to see why.

3. Arcade Fire Wins Grammy: At the 53rd Grammys, Arcade Fire took the Best Album of the Year award. The Internet took a collective shit. Who Is Arcade Fire? was the outcry as many blogs, tweets, and Facebook posts wondered why Eminem, Lady GaGa, and Katy Perry lost out to the Pitchfork-loved Canadian Indie band. Even the band was surprised.

2. Amy Winehouse’s Death: Amy Winehouse, the soulful pop singer that electrified the world in 2006 with six Grammy awards, died of alcohol poisoning 23 July, joining the infamous 27 Club. While she had been in and out of rehab centers for years (and famously singing about it), her death still came as a shock to many, including some local soul singers who put together a tribute concert in August.

1. Occupy Wall Street: While not technically a music story, the Occupy Wall Street protest (and Occupy Movement it spawned) was, and continues to be, so large that it crept into every corner of our society, including pop culture. Many musicians have supported it, sometimes staging whole concerts to keep morale high. Moreover, the protests have pulled public attention back towards the political realities of the US and abroad, prompting a more focused debate about economic equality and corporate influence in government.

In fact, the last show we attending was the Upstanding Youth 10 year anniversary on November 19th. We were only there for a few hours, however, as words were to be written on our novels. Even still, we caught all of Black Square‘s and Hell Camino‘s sets and half of the headliner’s.

Hell Camino played  slower and more honky tonk than I would have thought possible, obviously trying to play to the ska sound of the night. It was still great, however, and was really cool to see them work outside of the norm. They did still throw down a couple of psychobilly songs, however, which got our blood flowing.

Black Square were awesome as always. I’m not sure how many times I’ve listened to their latest CD, but I literally cannot stay seated when they play their golden songs (which are all of them, of course). My friends and I made our way through the fifty or so people who has amassed during the band’s first song (“In The Day,” if memory serves) and found that there was a lot of skanking going on in the front. Like, more than I had ever seen for this band, even at their own monthly headliner “Black Saturday.” We, of course, quickly joined in. The best moment of this set (and probably the whole show) was when they had steamrolled into a high energy song (“Slow Down” or “Black Square” stand out in my hazy memory) and all of us up front managed to look up at T. R. at the same moment. From the stage, he looked down at us very seriously and held up one hand, his index finger making a small circle. Instantly, the dancing devolved into a roaring mosh of twelve or so people jumping, tumbling, and smashing our way around the stage. I caught a glimpse of T. R.’s face wearing a smirk as he went back to playing.

The last bit of the show we caught was Upstanding Youth, the now 10 year old band. Before they went on, someone introduced them as the “best ska band of all time,” an extremely tall order that I don’t really agree with. To me, they were a pretty decent ska band, but, honestly, fairly vanilla. I am by no means an authority of the genre, however.

Really, after more than a year kicking around China Town and seeing many talented bands barely scraping twenty people out for a show, I was somewhat upset to see a hundred people flood into Anna’s for this set only. I recognized no one in this new crowd and it seems most of them had eschewed the previous two performances, despite their quality. As far as I can tell, Upstanding Youth had pulled a huge crowd from another scene (I guessed Waikiki, but that was a hunch) into the bar that I have only gone to see “Chi-To bands” perform at. Perhaps I am being too scene-insular.

NOTE: In this next breakdown paragraph, I’m going to only talk about what I heard at the UY show. I’ve since listened to their recorded stuff and found it to be quite different.

To give a fair shake to the band, they were good. Whereas I generally like punk with my ska, Upstanding Youth were straight ska with a side of pop. I can see how the band has become quite popular on Oahu as they have incorporated many of what I would consider to be ‘traditional Hawaiian’ sounds into their slow to mid-tempo songs. It was more music to groove than dance to. Except for a few brave souls, the farthest anyone in the crowd got to moving was a small sway or head bob. There isn’t anything wrong with that, of course, but it was hard for me to chill out after Black Square had shocked me into action.

That was really my issue with Upstanding Youth, the proclaimed “best ska band of all time”: Black Square was just generally more enjoyable. My quick and unscientific poll of the people I knew at the show confirmed my thoughts; You have to be a great band to follow Black Square. And Upstanding Youth, to me, was not great, but good at best.

Feel free to comment/argue with me in the comments, on our Facebook, or Twitter. Also, czech out some blurry cell phone photos on Flickr. I swear we’ll get a decent camera some day.

P.S.: Tomorrow night (9pm) there is a sweet show going on at Mercury. $5 for 5 bands, including the HEP favs Gnarwal, Coral Stabz, and The Substitoots. Not sure if we’ll make it, but totes buy us a beer if we do. We could use the booze.

First up, Josh86 and JetSetter Productions are throwing a special Friday edition of The Clampdown featuring 2face4, 13th Legion, campfire, and The Deliberates. I’ve not seen any of these bands save campfire, but, if the word on the street is anything, Anna Banana’s is the place to be tomorrow, Friday 11th, at 9pm. $5 cover, as usual.

Then, on Saturday at 9pm, Black Saturday will be rocking hard at The Venue. This second-Saturday-of-every-month show is always great fun (and was actually one of the first shows I ever attended in Hawaii, almost a year ago). November’s iteration includes my psychobilly love The Hell Caminos, the folk-indie-acoustic-hunky Discord & Rye (L: swoon), ska-reggae The Blue Ribbons, and, as always, the amazing talent of The Black Square. Not sure what the cover is, but I do believe they run a special on Mickey’s grenades for $2.

If a DJ is more your tune this weekend, check out thirtyninehotel for Luca Bacchetti, an internationally acclaimed artist making his impression on the island. These shows usually come with a steep cover, so be ready.

Finally, At Sea is going to affect Anna’s on Tuesday, the 15th. The amazing post-rock band was featured in a previous post and this will be our first outing to see them since. Backing up the musical emotion are Makua Valley Blast Test and Moon Occults the Sun, two other experimental bands. Get there early to set your mind in the mood with a few drinks. Cover is probably $5.

That’ll do it for shows up through Tuesday. We’re following some awesome shows next week, but we’ll talk about those more then! In the mean time, keep us informed through Facebook, Twitter, and email.

Keep rocking, Honolulu.

If we haven’t said it enough or already, we are so psyched for you, Gnarwhal!  Go show those San Franciscans what you’re made of!  We’ll miss you all the way.  But I guess if we get our butts moving soon, we’ll get to tell you in person tonight.

See you there!

Okay, okay, so it’s not Halloween anymore, but it was a crazy weekend for us here at HEP. Hope you all had fun with your costumes and candy.

On Saturday night, we took the plunge into Hallowbaloo, the three-day Honolulu music festival. In short, it was barely controlled insanity. Three or four blocks of Chi-To were gated off, numerous stages erected, several food trucks parked, and thousands of costumed partiers were beer’d. The costumes ranged from several hula lamps and Hunter S. Thompsons to two Deviled Eggs (literally two fried eggs made of cardboard worn by horned red-people). Sadly, us HEPsters were a little late to enjoy any of the live entertainment (including a reportedly amazing performance from Cherry Blossom Cabaret), but we did manage to scoot into 39Hotel for some PBR’s and, eventually, spill into The Venue for a show by Black Square and Kings of Spade! Overall, Hallowbaloo was pretty fun, though the crowd was more of a crush than a background and the lines were quite long for everything (we didn’t even get into Bar35 due to the thirty minute to one hour wait).

After a few hangover remedies, we were back in Honolulu Sunday night for a show and party at Orphanage. This old mansion (formally known as the Dollhouse) is an amazing treasure hidden in the northern hills of Honolulu and occupied by a 90′s sitcom worth of characters. The venue for the night was actually the living room (or “White Tiger Lounge” as they call it) which we managed to pack forty or so screaming, costumed people into. Coral Stabz started out the night in celebration of their new album release (stealin’ pakalolo), though we were late due to the horrendous H1 traffic and missed what I was told was an epic performance. Haven’t had a chance to listen to the tape yet, but I’m sure it’s amazing as well.

We did arrive in time to rock out to Siblings, who were all dressed up as bicycle missionaries from the Church of Siblings of Radder-Day Saints. The mosh basically spilled into the band at this point and, more than once, Joey Green found himself at the back of the crowd, his microphone cord wrapped around his neck like a whip, drawing him back to the front. As the songs raged on and the band/crowd mixture shook the room, the temperature spiked, cooking us until the floor was slick with sweat. It is at this point I will remind you this took place in a living room.

After a booze, water, smoke, and air break (in that order), (G)Narwhal fired up their set. This was now three hours into the drinking and over an hour into the concert and where there was moshing for the punk of Siblings, there is pure insanity for Narwhal. People are attempting to crowd surf, only to smash their heads into the ceiling and fall onto the couch, wrapped up like a mummy in the overhead decorations. Travis of Coral Stabz has covered himself in fake blood and is using it to zombify everyone around him. Someone has taken Adam’s extra drumstick and is smashing additional cymbals to his beat. Not one, not two, not three, but four “last songs” are played. The actual last “last song,” my personal favorite “Tell Me,” is sung mostly by the crowd as Erica’s microphone cord has been disconnected by several feet and she is frantically chasing the end around, ensnaring it just in time to belt the chorus and then lose it again. This is the best show of their’s that I have ever seen.

Oh, did we not mention that we’re writing novels?  That’s right, this month is National Novel Writing Month, commonly referred to as NaNoWriMo.  Over the course of the next 30 days, Kendle, I, and countless other literary geeks will be frantically writing our whimsical novels at the approximate speed of 1,667 words a day.

While Kendle is writing what promises to be a mind-bending sci-fi novel, I’ve taken it upon myself to fulfill a lifelong goal by composing a delectably cheesy romance novel.

If you’re not into writing but still want to keep tabs on the HEPsters while we attempt not to shirk our blogging duties in favor of our inevitable literary greatness, you can track our progress from your very own computer!  Follow me here and Kendle here.  If you want to participate and harass us into meeting our word-quotas, go to nanowrimo.org to create a profile and get cracking!

That’s just about enough procrastination for me.  Now back to that steamy bar scene…